I was Mum to my kids and Mummy Kenna to my kid’s friends. The one with the open door, the freezer always stocked with pizza and chips, and a seat at the table for anyone who needed it. My house was the fun house, the safe house, the place where my kid’s friends showed up unannounced and always knew they were welcome.

It wasn’t about being the cool mum; it was about being the present mum. The one who listened without judgment, who gave advice without preaching, who made sure every child who walked through my door felt seen, heard, and valued.

Some came because home was tough. Some came because they needed space to breathe. Others just wanted to be where the laughter never stopped. Whatever the reason, I never asked. I just made sure they knew they belonged.

I didn’t realise it at the time, but I was doing more than just offering a safe space I was helping shape young lives. I was teaching them that they mattered, that they had someone in their corner, that they were never truly alone. Even now, I hear from some of those kids, now young adults, who say my home was their refuge, a place where they felt seen when the world made them feel invisible.

How I Created This Safe Space

Creating a safe space for kids wasn’t about grand gestures; it was about consistency. I made sure they always knew they were welcome, without conditions. I never pried into why they were there, but I made sure they felt comfortable enough to talk if they wanted to. There was always food, always warmth, always a sense of belonging.

I learned to foster an environment where kids could be themselves, free of pressure or expectations. I made time for them, engaged with them, and let them know they mattered. It was in the little things remembering their favourite snacks or drink. Who the vegetarians or the meat eaters were. Letting them take up space without fear of being a burden.

How Parents Can Create a Safe Space

Every child deserves a place where they feel safe, and as parents, we have the power to create that environment. It starts with being present not just physically, but emotionally. Put down the phone, make eye contact, show them they have your full attention. Create a home where they feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgment or punishment.

Make your home a space where kids want to be. That doesn’t mean filling it with things; it means filling it with warmth, laughter, and understanding. Be the adult they can come to when the world feels too big, too scary, or just too much.

Learning to Listen

One of the biggest lessons I learned as a parent was that kids don’t always need you to fix things they just need you to listen. So often, we jump to solutions when all they really want is to be heard. I learned to stop giving answers and just to sit with them in their feelings. Sometimes, the greatest comfort is knowing someone understands.

We all want to protect our children from pain, but life is full of challenges we can’t shield them from. What we can do is teach them that they are not alone, that they are strong enough to face whatever comes their way, and that no matter what, they always have a place where they are safe and loved.

My house was never just a house. It was a home for anyone who needed it. And that’s something every parent has the power to create.

About the Author

By Fiona, one of our incredible Resilient Kid coaches.

I’ve always been the person people turn to for a listening ear, the steady presence, the one who makes others feel safe. Mine was the house all the kids came to, the place where there was always food in the fridge, laughter in the air, and a space to just be. No judgment, no pressure, just a home where they knew they were welcome.

That same warmth and understanding now shape the work I do. With a background in mental health counselling, I support children and young people in navigating their emotions, building resilience, and finding their confidence. For me, this isn’t just a job; it’s personal. Every child deserves to feel heard, valued, and safe, and I’m proud to be that steady presence in their lives.

Connect with Fiona

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